This morning was weird, in that Nathan didn't come walking in the door at 8am. It's a strange feeling that I hope will get better in time. I can't stress enough how hard it is to not see someone who has been a part of your life for 4 1/2 years. I believe in my heart that the decision I made was the right one, but it doesn't take away the fact that Nathan will be missed.
Mike did well over the weekend. He's eating, it just takes alot longer and he eats less. I am hoping that the Medicaid switch goes smoothly so that we can proceed with switching over to hospice. I received the form from social services that begins the process for evaluation, and I'm concerned because it asks about "S's". If they deem Mike's level of care as too "high", they may deny the aide, which means we are back to square one. I just cannot fathom what's involved in trying to do the right thing for the one you love. Once again, I say that it's no wonder our government has no money. They almost make it impossible to care for a loved one at home, even though it would cost them MUCH less. I just don't get it.
I'm trying to think positive thoughts.
Today also happens to be the 23rd Anniversary of the day that Mike and I started dating. Boy how time flies.