Yesterday, like all other holidays during the past 7 years, was bittersweet. While I am blessed to have Mike with us, he is not the way we would wish him to be. When Mike was first diagnosed, the kids were 7 & 9. He was not able to drive and I would not let him take the kids out on his own. Therefore, I never really got any gifts for the holidays because after all, who would get them? It's not like I was ever a "materialistic" person, but I would be lying if I said that it didn't hurt just a little. When Mike was first diagnosed, he would get upset at his lack of ability to go shopping, so I decided then, then I wouldn't get him anything either...so he wouldn't feel bad. Instead, for the holidays, we always got something "for us", usually for the house. This way we could each say we got something, but it saved Mike the frustration of not being able to get anything for me.
Yesterday, things came full circle. Courtney, Brandon and Mike had gotten me two trees for the backyard which we had planted about a month ago. That was my choice and it was something I wanted. Yesterday, Courtney and Brandon, being old enough to walk to the stores on their own, went and got a card from them to me AND from Mike to me. Needless to say, I cried. My children, who's necks I could wring at any given moment, were mature and thoughtful enough on their own to do this. My emotions were all over the map. I was touched that they thought of this on their own, I was sad that Mike couldn't and I was upset when I thought of their age when Mike was diagnosed and just how far they have come. Alzheimer's has been their life, yet they seem to be doing OK.
No, my Mother's Day was not like most, but it was good. I have my husband still at home with us and I have my two wonderful children. We may not have all the gifts and glamour, but we have each other. In other words my Mother's Day was perfect.