Thursday, November 22, 2007

Happy Thanksgiving

I really wish I could say it was a great Thanksgiving. While Mike is doing fairly "OK" and everyone else is fine, it just didn't seem like a "Happy" Thanksgiving. Mike coughed ALOT during breakfast, didn't have much lunch and ate fairly light for dinner. He was coughing a little for dinner. As usual, I worry and begin to wonder. Is this the beginning of Mike not being able to swallow....or is it that he has the cold we all had? Either choice is not good.

I wonder what Mike will be like when he can no longer swallow. Will he still be laughing and smiling the way he is now, or will he enter further into his own world and sit with an even blanker stare? Will we know when it's going to happen? We will ever be ready?

I can't say that Mike is at that stage now, but on days like today, I always get scared. It is a reminder of what lies ahead, and I don't think we will EVER be ready for it.

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